deviant ART

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Defense. by ~utahgy:iconutahgy:



My heart does race
as I set the pace.
The pounding in my head
wont seem to end.
How could these two hands
spill the blood of man?

It was dark
with a cloak black as stark
He came at me
with a blade made of mail
Driving onward hard, aiming for my heart.

Quick as a flash
I brought forth my lash!
Spun it about the man
and broke his hand.
The sound was deathening
and my movements like quickening

I took his mail
and drove it like a nail!
Into his heart
he gave no more start.
Men came to holler
and caused quite a bother

Then my heart began to race
as I quickened my pace.
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Submitted: May 2
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Author's Comments

This is my second peice of poetry ever. I dont think its as good as the first one.

Please tell me why!

Devious Comments

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~deeman45:icondeeman45: May 2, 2008, 4:22:24 PM
Hroom...Try to make the lines more eve. Line 2 of all the stanzas always has 4 , etc...

--
"I cuss, you cuss, we all cuss for asparagus!!!"

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